Let’s vow, NEVER AGAIN
by Howard Meharg (2007)
I attended a 45th reunion celebration for a class that graduated in 1961. Great fun and a wonderful bunch of “kids.” One of them was Neil Lieurance.
I was completing my second year of teaching in 1961. Didn’t know much but it was exhilarating and I was still feeling elated and a sense of “Wow! I’m actually being paid to do this!”
One guy , no, not Neil but (as it turns out) his cousin, Bob Rockett, got up and said, “I still remember Mr. Meharg telling me just prior to the spring concert that he would give me a C as a final grade in choir if I would stay home during the spring concert, but that he would flunk me if I showed up.” I don’t know if he was playing for a laugh (he got it) or if this really happened. It could have happened. I wasn’t very careful in such matters back then.
A friend, Olaf, who is in the tech services business in Toronto, sent this message to me a couple of days ago…part of an online conversation we were having. Olaf, aside from his computer work, sings in a band called “Vile Richard.” But this is what he said about his long time girl friend:
"I can't get L isa to sing at all. When she was six years old she sang in a choir for school. Just before they went into a competition, her teacher pulled her aside and told her that while all the other kids were singing she should "mouth the words". She took it very personally and that was the end of her singing career. I guess it would be quite a blow to one's confidence!"
It’s a story I’ve heard dozens of times! It’s a story I wish were not true. And, I’m so, so, sorry…but it may be a story a student of mine could tell. In my egocentric rush to have “my kids” sound good, I could easily have shushed a few like that, especially in my days of teaching elementary school music.
Not long ago I became acquainted with a fellow attending my church who asked me if I could help him sing better. He had acting experience, was not afraid to speak in front of crowds but, literally, was ashamed that he couldn’t “carry a tune.” He, like Lisa, had been told a long time ago that he couldn’t sing. I met with him. At first I thought he was right…not even close. He had a low voice. I found his note on the piano and we experimented with moving on up the scale from there, and finally, with singing a familiar hymn an octave lower. With patience and practice, this man can sing. Even if he sings the melody an octave lower than most men, he’s singing.
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I know virtually nothing about the brain, ear, vocal mechanism connection and how pitch discernment and tone matching takes place. I’m convinced, however, that virtually all people can be taught to sing. Some may take longer to develop the skill than others. Some may need friendly and oh so kindly help.
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I urge us all to vow to never tell anyone…no matter what age, but especially children…that it would be better to “mouth the words” this time. We can’t control what family members or others might say to them, but how devastating to hear a trusted “professional” imply that “you can’t sing.”
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I’d love to hear your story. How do you help a youngster (or oldster, for that matter) learn to “carry” that tune…and how do you do it without the slightest hint of psychological injury or hurt?
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